David Letterman: Top Ten Reasons Chris Christie Endorsed Mitt Romney
10. Romney sounds like pastrami
9. Perry wouldn’t let him fry eggs on the Texas electric chair
8. Two liters of Shop Rite root beer and a king size Snickers did the trick
7. If elected, Romney said he’d overturn rule requiring enormous people to buy extra airplane seat
6. Needed something to do between lunch and second lunch
5. Acting on direct orders from Colonel Sanders
4. It was a close call between him and Rick Santorum — just kidding
3. Mistook Mitt’s repeated ‘bi-partisan’ references to mean two kinds of cheese
2. Movie star good lucks — who could resist?
1. Only other options were the nutjob, the crackpot, the pizza dude and Newt
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David Letterman: Top Ten Reasons Chris Christie Endorsed Mitt Romney
October 14, 2011 — Ron ChusidQuote of the Day
October 12, 2011 — Ron Chusid“On Tuesday New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie announced he that he was not running for president. And then on Wednesday Sarah Palin also announced that she would not run. Palin said she would love to be president but she just couldn’t handle the two-year commitment.” –Seth Meyers
David Letterman: Top Ten Reasons Chris Christie Is Not Running for President
October 6, 2011 — Ron ChusidDavid Letterman: Top Ten Reasons Chris Christie Is Not Running for President
10. As always, he’s following his gut
9. Wants to spend more time with pie
8. There isn’t a Quiznos within five miles of the White House
7. Afraid of going up against the Newt Gingrich juggernaut
6. Doesn’t own a tie without a mustard stain
5. He was advised against it by his closest confidante, Duncan Hines
4. Constitution requires every candidate to be able to see their feet
3. Can’t understand response because of chewing
2. Hank Williams, Jr. just compared him to Stalin
1. He was born in Kenya
Quote of the Day
October 6, 2011 — Ron Chusid“Not only did Christie say he’s not going to run, he’s also not going to jog or walk anymore.” –Jimmy Kimmel
Christie Holding Press Conference Today
October 4, 2011 — Ron ChusidChris Christie is holding a news conference today, presumably to say whether he is running for the Republican nomination. I’m not sure how many will watch, considering he is competing with the announcement of the next version of the iPhone. I do wish that rather than dwelling on whether Christie is too fat to be president, more pundits were asking if Christie (and other GOP candidates) are too right wing to be president.
Update: Various sources including ABC News and National Review are saying that Christie will announce that he is not running.
David Letterman: Top Ten Ways The Country Would Be Different If Chris Christie Were President
September 29, 2011 — Ron ChusidDavid Letterman: Top Ten Ways The Country Would Be Different If Chris Christie Were President
10. Al-Qaida taunts America with ‘Your president’s so fat’ jokes
9. Goodbye White House vegetable garden
8. Cabinet will now have a Secretary of Cake
7. New state: Fatbuttachusetts
6. Congress does whatever he wants, because fat guys are, like, super-strong when they freak out
5. Presidential retreat moved from Camp David to Hershey Park
4. Taxpayers would have to pay for the president’s second seat on Air Force One
3. New national anthem: the ‘Chili’s baby back ribs’ song
2. Instead of Iraq, we’d invade IHOP
1. Scandal when president is caught in Oval Office with Betty Crocker and Sara Lee
