The Top Ten Things Written on Sarah Palin’s Hand

February 8, 2010 — Ron Chusid

With everyone talking about Sarah Palin’s crib notes on her hand, I would like to present The Top Ten Things Written on Sarah Palin’s Hand (after passing them through a spell checker). I know this is a lot of stuff to fit on a hand, but Palin has practice at this. After all, this is how she passed her tests in college.

10. Will cut taxes & reduce deficit at same time after elected

9. 12345 (My secret password for all internet sites)

8. Foreign Policy Experience–Can See Russia from Alaska

7. Obama is a Socialist (Note to self: look up what “socialist” means)

6. Uphold the Constitution (Note to self: must read the Constitution some day)

5. Ask for divine intervention from God when have questions about what government should do

4. Stay away from explaining about dinosaurs and people–audience often laughs at me when I talk about this unless all Republicans

3. Explain how it is cold outside, proving global warming is a hoax

2. Make sure not to use any Purell on hand before speech

1. If not listed here, just say whatever a Maverick would say

Posted in Humor and Satire, Sarah Palin. 6 Comments »

Sarah Palin’s Hand

February 7, 2010 — Ron Chusid

A dab of Purell not only destroys harmful germs. It can wash away all of Sarah Palin’s talking points.

Palin’s use of crib notes on her palm, which I discussed more seriously here, is likely to remain a source for endless jokes about Palin, such as in my current Facebook status above. She is lucky this came out too late for Saturday Night Live last night but I can imagine the late night comedians really getting her on Monday.

Will David Letterman’s Top Ten List be The Top Ten Things Written on Sarah Palin’s Hand?

I’m not sure why so many people are surprised by this. After all, it is how she got through all those tests in college.

Posted in Humor and Satire, Sarah Palin. 3 Comments »

Palin, Palm Notes, and Telepromters

February 7, 2010 — Ron Chusid

There’s been a lot of uproar in the blogosphere about how Sarah Palin used crib notes written on her palm during her speech before the Tea Party convention. The real problem is not that she used crib notes, which I see nothing wrong with (although she could have been more discrete) but that her crib notes were to a question during the Q&A session.

Just like George Bush, it looks like Sarah Palin is relying on planted questions. Considering the disasters we have seen when she has tried to take questions from the media this is somewhat understandable. Still, she is before a friendly audience and I would think she could handle questions from that crowd.

I am far more concerned about the content of her answer, such as calling for government to seek divine intervention from God, than whether she got this answer from her palm.

Many have pointed out the hypocrisy of having crib notes after attacking Barack Obama for using a teleprompter. Crib notes are not the same as a teleprompter with the entire text. My suspicion is that there are three main reasons why Palin could get by with limited crib notes while Obama prefers a teleprompter:

  1. Memorizing a speech word for word takes much more time. Obama has a day job at present. Sarah Palin does not.
  2. It is easier to give a speech with vague generalities without the prepared text to read. For example, when you are calling for budget cuts but avoiding any specifics as to what you would cut it is easier to talk with minimal notes.
  3. As far as I can determine, there was not a prepared text distributed to the press prior to the speech. Prepared text for Obama’s speeches are routinely released ahead of time and the media quotes from these. While there would normally be no problem with a speaker varying from the actual prepared text while making the planned points, there could be confusion when a prepared text has been made public.

The teleprompter argument is also a bogus argument as Barack Obama has spoken many times without a teleprompter. This included his recent question and answer session at a Republican gathering. During the presidential campaign he varied between the use of a teleprompter and speaking without one, such as prior to a key speech prior to the Iowa caucuses in which he memorized the speech believing this would give it more intensity.

Here is the full video of Palin’s speech:

Posted in Barack Obama, Sarah Palin. 1 Comment »

Sarah Palin Gets Her Facts Wrong and Advises Seeking Divine Intervention From God

February 6, 2010 — Ron Chusid

Sarah Palin spoke before the Tea Party convention, both rewriting history and suggesting that a top government priority should be asking for divine intervention from god. David Weigel reports on how she got her facts wrong about recent election results:

Palin adroitly re-wrote the history of the past three months of elections, giving the Tea Party movement credit for Scott Brown’s election in Massachusetts and calling the White House “0 for 3″ in recent elections–leaving out the New York special election where her candidate, the Conservative Party’s Doug Hoffman, lost in a last-minute upset.

“You know,” said Palin of Brown, “he was just a guy with a truck, and a passion to serve his country,” said Palin. Brown, however, was a state senator and state representative whose campaign staffers cut their teeth with Mitt Romney.

The Guardian reports that things got even weirder at the Q&A session:

The weirdest part of the evening came not during the speech but during the following Q&A session. Asked what she thought that a Republican-controlled congress’s top three priorities should be, she answered: stop spending, energy policy and … well, here’s the whole quote, judge for yourself:

“I think, kind of tougher to put our arms around, but allowing America’s spirit to rise again by not being afraid to kind of go back to some of our roots as a God fearing nation where we’re not afraid to say especially in times of potential trouble in the future here, where we’re not afraid to say, you know, we don’t have all the answers as fallible men and women so it would be wise of us to start seeking some divine intervention again in this country, so that we can be safe and secure and prosperous again. To have people involved in government who aren’t afraid to go that route, not so afraid of the political correctness that you know – they have to be afraid of what the media said about them if they were to proclaim their alliance to our creator.”

So, one of the US congress’s top priorities should be … asking for divine intervention from God? “I can think of two words right now that scare liberals: President Palin,” the moderator ended the evening by saying. A brief chant of “Run, Sarah, run,” broke out, although not one shared by the whole room. Proving, perhaps, that you don’t have to be a liberal to be worried by Sarah Palin.

Posted in Sarah Palin, Separation of Church and State. 7 Comments »

Stewart v. O’Reilly–The Uncut Version

February 6, 2010 — Ron Chusid

Jon Stewart appeared on Bill O’Reilly’s show in an interview divided over two nights. The interview as aired had many good lines:

Here’s what Fox has done, through their cyclonic perpetual emotional machine that is 24 hours a day, 7 days a week: They have taken reasonable concerns about this president and this economy and turned it into full-fledged panic attack about the next coming of Chairman Mao.

While Stewart made many points critical of Fox, Gawker compared the aired version with the full version posted on line (embedded above) and disagreed with O’Reilly’s claim that “It’s a fair cut.”

If by “fair cut” O’Reilly means “cut in a manner that left some of Stewart’s best lines, most effective arguments, and most convincing evidence out of the interview and hidden from the broadcast audience,” then he’s absolutely right.

They provided some examples:

Here’s the best exchange of the whole interview, in which Stewart gets O’Reilly to admit that he thinks Barack Obama believes in “tyranny and socialism,” and then asks him why Obama’s most generous spending has been to bail out banks. He closed with this unanswerable question: “How many tyrants do you know that really suffer because they can’t get cloture?” O’Reilly rejoindered with a lame joke about NBC, because what else could he do? None of this made the air…

There were also plenty of sharp points from Stewart that were edited down to, um, duller points. Take this exchange, from the Fox News cut:

STEWART: Here’s the brilliance – here’s the brilliance of Fox News. What you have been able to do, you and Dr. Ailes, have been able to mainstream conservative talk radio.

O’REILLY: Why wouldn’t John McCain come on this program during the last campaign? Why did he dodge us and not come on if you – (inaudible), if we’re in business to help the GOP, he wouldn’t come in.

STEWART: But you’re not in the business of John McCain. He is not GOP enough for you. You’re in the business to help Sarah Palin.

Posted in Humor and Satire, News Media, Sarah Palin. 1 Comment »

Republican Fight Double Feature: Palin v. Limbaugh and Gingrich v. Club for Growth

February 4, 2010 — Ron Chusid

As a general rule of thumb Republicans are totally inept at governing, but are a highly effective opposition party. On the other hand, Democrats do a far better (even if not perfect) job of governing, but cannot match the Republicans in a dirty political fight. It is great to see the Republicans occasionally battle each other. We have two such battles at present with Sarah Palin vs. Rush Limbaugh and Newt Gingrich vs. The Club For Growth.

At least Sarah Palin is showing some degree of consistency in attacking Rush Limbaugh for a “retard” comment after calling on Rahm Emanuel to be fired after he called strategy of some liberals on health care reform “f–king retarded.”

The cases aren’t entirely analogous.  Palin responded on her own to Emanuel’s comment but only showed this consistency in criticizing Limbaugh through a spokesperson when asked about this. Still, it is good to see the two fighting in this manner. There is also a difference between Emanuel using an insult such as this against fellow Democrats in the heat of an argument and Limbaugh calling a meeting of advocates for the mentally handicapped  a “retard summit at the White House.”

Of course, if we can believe Levi Johnston, Sarah Palin also joked about her “retarded baby.” I guess she’ll have to demand that she resign. Oh wait…

Meanwhile the Club For Growth is attacking Newt Gingrich for supporting Republicans who are not as extreme as they are. Gingrich was campaigning for Utah Senator Bob Bennett while the Club for Growth is working to defeat him:

“I wish the Club for Growth would spend as much time and energy to defeat liberal Democrats as they do dividing Republicans,” Gingrich told a crowd at Bennett’s formal campaign launch, according to the Deseret News. “I try to defeat liberal Democrats. I don’t spend much time trying to defeat Republicans.”

That prompted the influential conservative group to take a shot at Gingrich for backing “ultra-liberal” Dede Scozzafava in last year’s special election in New York’s 23rd district. The moderate Scozzafava quit the race after being harangued by conservative activists who supported Doug Hoffman. Democrat Bill Owens eventually won the race.

“Newt has proven time and again that he will support any Republican, regardless of policies and principles,” said Club president Chris Chocola in a statement. “That’s his right, but the Club for Growth PAC puts principles over party,”

“Newt was wrong about New York-23, and he’s wrong about Utah,” Chocola continued. “And pretty soon, Bennett will wish Newt never gave him the kiss of Dede.”

Actually Gingrich was right about New York-23 as the Club for Growth’s strategy led to the Republicans losing a Congressional seat which they had held for a century. See, good things do happen when the Republicans fight among themselves.

Posted in Republicans, Sarah Palin. 1 Comment »

Republicans Are the Stupidest People In The World

February 1, 2010 — Ron Chusid

TPM has reported on the results of a Daily Kos/Reseach 2000 Poll of self-described Republicans which is not yet officially released. If this is accurate, Republicans are the stupidest people in the world:

• 39% of Republicans want President Obama to be impeached.

• 63% think Obama is a socialist.

• Only 42% believe Obama was born in the United States.

• 21% think ACORN stole the 2008 election — that is, that Obama didn’t actually win it, and isn’t legitimately the president, with 55% saying they are “not sure.” This number is actually significantly lower than it was in a similar question from Public Policy Polling (D) back in November, which said that 52% of Republicans thought ACORN stole it. So does this mean Obama is gaining ground among Republicans? As it is, only just over 20% of Republicans will say that Obama actually won the election.

• 53% think Sarah Palin is more qualified than Obama to be president.

• 23% want to secede from the United States.

• 73% think gay people should not be allowed to teach in public schools. This position puts the GOP base well to the right of none other than Ronald Reagan, who helped defeat the Briggs Initiative, a 1978 referendum in California that would have forbidden gays or people who advocated gay rights from teaching in public schools.

• 31% want contraception to be outlawed.

Posted in Barack Obama, Polls, Republicans, Sarah Palin, Social Issues. 9 Comments »

Most Americans Do Not Want Sarah Palin To Run

January 19, 2010 — Ron Chusid

There’s some hope for this country. A majority of Americans, even Republicans, do not want Sarah Palin to run for president. CBS News reports:

A new CBS News poll finds that a large majority of Americans say they do not want former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin to run for president.

Specifically, 71 percent say they do not want the former Republican vice presidential nominee to run for president, while 21 percent say they do want her to run.

When the results are split out by party, 56 percent of Republicans say they do not want her to seek the office and 30 percent do. Meanwhile, 88 percent of Democrats do not want her to run. Among independents, 65 percent do not want her to run and 25 percent do.

The poll also finds that more people view Palin negatively than positively and that her book tour did not improve overall views of her. However, she is a little better-known now than she was last fall, and both favorable and unfavorable ratings of her have increased slightly.

If conservatives had any sense they would appreciate a poll which doesn’t taint them by associating them with Palin. Hot Air tries to blow it for them by questioning the accuracy of the results. If the poll can be believed, it shows that conservatives are the only group with a favorable view of Palin, but still do not want her to run:

Conservatives are the only ideological group that holds net positive views of her — just under half do, while a quarter are unfavorable and a quarter of conservatives are undecided.

But while favorable toward her, most conservatives say they do not want to see Palin run in 2012 – 58 percent of conservatives say she should not run.

Most Americans do not know much about the Tea Party movement:

Sixty-nine percent of Americans are either undecided about the movement or haven’t heard enough so far to have an opinion about it. Among those who have heard of it, 18 percent have a favorable opinion of it and 12 percent have an unfavorable opinion.

Fair enough. Americans don’t know much about the tea baggers, and we’ve already seen that the tea baggers don’t know much about American, or anything else.

Posted in Polls, Republicans, Sarah Palin. No Comments »

The Tea Party Scam

January 17, 2010 — Ron Chusid

The tea party movement is a scam both intellectually and financially. They promote a disgraceful distortion of our national heritage to spread the know-nothing ignorance of reactionaries such as Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck. They offer a false choice to those who do not understand the issues and an opportunity for those who want to take advantage of them to make big bucks.

Frank Rich, after noting how Michael Steele is profiting from his position, turns to the tea party:

Both Steele and Palin claim to be devotees of the tea party movement. “I’m a tea partier, I’m a town-haller, I’m a grass-roots-er” is how Steele put it in a recent radio interview, wet-kissing a market he hopes will buy his book. Palin has far more grandiose ambitions. She recently signed on as a speaker for the first Tea Party Convention, scheduled next month in Nashville — even though she had turned down a speaking invitation from the annual Conservative Political Action Conference, the traditional meet-and-greet for the right. The conservative conference doesn’t pay. The Tea Party Convention does. A blogger at Nashville Scene reported that Palin’s price for the event was $120,000.

The entire Tea Party Convention is a profit-seeking affair charging $560 a ticket — plus the cost of a room at the Opryland Hotel. Among the convention’s eight listed sponsors is Tea Party Emporium, which gives as its contact address 444 Madison Avenue in New York, also home to the high-fashion brand Burberry. This emporium’s Web site offers a bejeweled tea bag at $89.99 for those furious at “a government hell bent on the largest redistribution of wealth in history.” This is almost as shameless as Glenn Beck, whose own tea party profiteering has included hawking gold coins merchandised by a sponsor of his radio show.

Last week a prominent right-wing blogger, Erick Erickson of RedState.com, finally figured out that the Tea Party Convention “smells scammy,” likening it to one of those Nigerian e-mails promising untold millions. Such rumbling about the movement’s being co-opted by hucksters may explain why Palin used her first paid appearance at Fox last Tuesday to tell Bill O’Reilly that she would recycle her own tea party profits in political contributions. But Erickson had it right: the tea party movement is being exploited — and not just by marketers, lobbyists, political consultants and corporate interests but by the Republican Party, as exemplified by Palin and Steele, its most prominent leaders.

Tea partiers hate the G.O.P. establishment and its Wall Street allies, starting with the Bushies who created TARP, almost as much as they do Obama and his Wall Street pals. When Steele and Palin pay lip service to the movement, they are happy to glom on to its anti-tax, anti-Obama, anti-government, anti-big-bank vitriol. But they don’t call for any actual action against the bailed-out perpetrators of the financial crisis. They’d never ask for investments to put ordinary Americans back to work. They have no policies to forestall foreclosures or protect health insurance for the tea partiers who’ve been shafted by hard times. Their only economic principle beside tax cuts is vilification of the stimulus that did save countless jobs for firefighters, police officers and teachers at the state and local level.

Posted in Op-eds, Republicans, Sarah Palin. 6 Comments »

Sarah Palin, Motivational Speaker

January 14, 2010 — Ron Chusid

Sarah Palin has found yet another job besides working at Fox and writing a book of fiction to make money since quitting her job as governor. She has become a motivational speaker. Here are her five topics for speeches:

  • How to Successfully Manage and Balance Your Personal and Professional Priorities
  • How to Overcome Obstacles with Creative Solutions
  • The Secrets to Effective Decision-Making
  • How to Have Grace Under Fire
  • How to Become a Person of Influence

At least she isn’t claiming to be able to talk about actual policy matters. She is actually an expert at some of these. She has come up with a number of creative solutions (also known as telling lies) to get her out of political jams. She has certainly figured out a way to become a person with far more influence than is justified by her abilities or knowledge.

Posted in Sarah Palin. 2 Comments »

Top Ten List: Highlights of Sarah Palin’s First Day at Fox

January 13, 2010 — Ron Chusid

David Letterman, commenting on Sarah Palin starting at Fox, claims that the network’s new slogan is Hair & Unbalanced. He also stated that Simon Cowell, who announced his retirement from American Idol, is the only judge who Sarah Palin could identify. The Top Ten list was:

Highlights of Sarah Palin’s First Day at Fox News

10. Ruined office floor by drilling for oil.

9. Detached a retina from winking at the camera

8. Got confused –Thought she signed with QCV

7. Pistol-whipped three guys who called her “Tina”

6. Released a statement saying she won’t follow Leno

5 .At lunchtime, Tod picked her up driving snow mobile through lobby

4. Sad to learn there was no actual fox to hunt

3. Hosted a “Fire Dave” roundtable

2. Actually found a place with more white people than Alaska

1. Announced plans to run for president in 2010

Posted in Humor and Satire, News Media, Sarah Palin, Television. 6 Comments »

Foxy Sarah

January 11, 2010 — Ron Chusid

Sarah Palin is going to  become a contributor to Fox. It is a good match for both, considering that neither cares much for accuracy or for the facts.

Now both Sarah Palin and Mike Huckabee are working for Fox. For the good of the country I hope the two are paid very well–so well they never want to leave Fox and return to government.

Posted in Mike Huckabee, News Media, Sarah Palin. 3 Comments »
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